Snake

What: Egyptair Airbus A320-200 en route from Cairo to Kuwait
Where: Egypt
When: Dec 3, 2012
Who: 90 aboard
Why: We have avoided this report for as long as possible, but finally decided to get it out of the way, since our mailboxes and emails are FULL of reports of:
“Snake on a plane forces emergency landing”
“Cobra Forces EgyptAir Flight to Make Emergency Landing”
“Flight Crew Finds reptile”
“Real Life Snake on a plane”
“Egyptian Cobra Bites Akram Abdul Latfi, Egypt Air Passenger”
“Cobra upgraded to First Class on Flight**”

Here’s the story: Akram Abdul Latif who was aboard this Egyptair flight was bitten by a snake. Actual snake on a plane, not the terrible movie. The Jordan Times says the snake was a cobra and that Latif owns a reptile shop where he was taking it. The snake had gotten out and the pet shop owner was bitten in the hand while trying to return the snake to the carry-on (as so many are theoretically and realistically bitten while trying to get anything back in the bag.)

The flight was diverted to Al Bahr Al Ahmar where first aid was administered to the man, and apparently none to the snake, who died. Actually, the snake did not die; it apparently was with Latif when he was refusing medical treatment. Some of the reports infer Latif was allowed to bring the snake to his shop in Kuwait. Without a crystal ball, I can’t say whether or not reports will be full of “Kuwait Reptile Store Owner Jailed for Smuggling” but according to “Newsfix” the cobra was corralled and confiscated by the cops. No one indicates if the snake was returned to Latif, or if a snake license, fine or a “snake coralling fee” was levied.

One can not help but picture the plane landing, a bouncer tossing Latif, his bag and beast out on their respective keisters*, the plane closing up and zipping down the runway before Latif can get back on.

* For the sake of the paragraph, we are endowing both the snake and the bag with honorary keisters, as they are not provided their own by nature.
** Honors for the best title of an article about the snake on a plane
*** The snake photo is clipped from the youtube video
**** No snakes were harmed in the writing of this article
*****[insert your own] Etc.